Emotions & Embodied Autonomy

MAPPING THE EMOTIONAL BODY

We have a map of our body stored in our brain. It’s a map that binds our emotional landscape to our physical real estate, a map of our psycho-proprioceptive self. Body, mind, and map are in constant reciprocity – they communicate back and forth to maintain muscle mass, postural alignment, and appropriate responses to our environment. Embodied autonomy depends on open lines of communication between our brain and the muscles, organs, glands, nerves, bones, and connective tissue that make up the rest of us. Forgotten or suppressed emotions sink deep and can shut down the links between our body and its mental map.

Some feelings are too much to be integrated during the time they are experienced. Trauma is a process by which the body deals with strong reactions to circumstances that have no place to go but into our flesh. Trauma comes in many flavors – these are a few:

• Shock trauma happens from a one-time event – like an automobile accident.
• Posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is a kind of shock response that keeps replaying when our bodies are reminded of a previous disturbing event, something that happened in the past. An unidentified trigger in our immediate environment sets off a rapid nervous system response, and our body has no choice but to react.
• Developmental trauma happens over time, for instance, during the time you grew up. It’s systemic, and more ongoing compared to shock trauma. Another way to describe developmental trauma is complex PTSD or CPTSD. Causes of CPTSD include emotional abuse, sexual abuse, neglect, and ambient abuse, such as chronic gaslighting or growing up with a mood-disordered parent around whom you must walk on eggshells.

TRAUMA

Trauma is retained in the body by a process of suppressing emotional pain. Suppression is a survival strategy, enacted in part to numb the pain of difficult experiences and memories. As it’s suppressed, our history of psychological trauma converts to muscular and connective tissue tension. Loss of sensation is one way such emotional dissociation becomes physicalized. Chronic physical pain is another.

When you push uncomfortable or unbearable memories deeper and deeper into body tissues, physical dissociation is likely to occur where these memories have been stuffed. Over time, these areas of tension break connection with your internal map of psycho-proprioceptive real estate. That point on your map goes dark, and the result is that we literally lose touch with ourselves.

BODYWORK

To work with deeply buried emotions, certain kinds of bodywork catalyze reconnection to previously forgotten traumatic events. Is it safe to explore these places? An experienced, grounded practitioner will make this a safe and productive experience, but only when bodywork is an appropriate choice. Skilled deep-tissue work, emotional-release work, craniosacral work, and work in the pelvic floor provoke, yet can also resolve memories that have been buried deep. The work must be carefully orchestrated, so it doesn’t overwhelm the nervous system of the receiver. Nuanced conversation and connection between bodyworker and client, along with informed consent are prerequisites.

CATHARSIS

For fifteen years, I taught hundreds of aspiring bodyworkers about craniosacral technique, deep tissue, and emotional release bodywork skills. I learned just how deeply the body retains emotion by working cathartically. Over time, my approach became far gentler as I noticed how much time each body needs to integrate recovered trauma and reconnect each client’s mental map with their psycho-emotional real estate.

When I began working with the pelvic floor, my technique changed again to accommodate my clients’ experiences of somatic recall. I was humbled by the body’s intelligence and the ability of flesh to retain and divulge memories. Without exception, my clients’ bodies showed me their appropriate pace – the pace that was safe and workable for each individual who suffered birth-related injuries or sexual abuse.

A GENTLER WAY

I learned to listen with more acuity and to wait until both psyche and body were ready to divulge and deal with their secrets. Sometimes it took years, and sometimes only seconds to transition from something buried to revelations as surprising as they were dramatic. I saw clients’ bodies shift instantaneously as they relaxed, allowing submerged memories to re-emerge and integrate while scar tissue melted under my fingertips. To describe and make sense of these experiences, I pursued a doctoral degree in somatic psychology.

While training in an effective array of touch modalities prepared me well for deep and intuitive work, I never suspected the dramatic and spontaneous changes I was suddenly witnessing. While excavating new layers of tension, it’s critically important to ensure that bodywork is productive rather than re-traumatizing. This is done through a process of accurate assessment.

Not everyone is ready for bodywork. In fact, the majority of people are not ready until they have done at least some work in the domains of biochemistry and biomechanics. Before you meet your demons, it’s useful to clean your blood and become more flexible. When blockage is present within these domains, it will block your embodied autonomy’s flow and sensation, and bodywork will hurt instead of delivering the pleasurable experience for which it is famous. Once the body is ready, the results are well worth the work it takes to prepare properly.

Ongoing emotional stress resists resolution without skilled intervention. To complete my PhD, a multidisciplinary dissertation was required to describe my experience of the relationship between trauma, inflammation, birth-related scars, and the successful resolution of painful sex for postpartum women. Key to resolving painful sex was to holding space for episodes of body-based memories to arise and integrate from body to psyche. When this occurred, pelvic floor pain, tension, and scar tissue melted in real time. Painful sex is not the only issue that responds to being held in safety while exploring a traumatic past. Chronic pain and other dis-ease respond to this as well.

ASSESSMENT

Though work with me generally starts with an assessment session, the issue of postpartum sexual pain from birth-related injury or surgery is a notable exception. I find the body is ready and willing to let go of birth-related trauma without an in-depth assessment process. I prioritize work with postpartum pain since high-quality services that address this issue are so limited. To schedule work to address postpartum pain or postpartum sexual issues, contact me here.

If you have troubling and mysterious physical pain or tension that is non-birth-related that you would like to explore, I invite you to schedule an assessment. Assessment will identify your particular barriers to radiant health, providing you with a most efficient map to begin your work.

Together, we create a plan of action to resolve suppressed emotions in your body and activate embodied autonomy. When you demonstrate commitment and a genuine desire to make necessary changes, there is the possibility to continue our journey together by coaching with me. During coaching, we partner to develop and improve your health practices, applying the insights gleaned from assessment. We work together to reconnect your mental and emotional body, and rediscover your embodied autonomy one step at a time. Once your plan is successfully consummated, and body-autonomy is activated, it may be time to explore emotions held in your body with bodywork.

If you’d like to schedule an assessment, learn more here. If you’re not sure you’re ready for a full assessment, but would like to explore some basic questions about your emotional body in an introductory session, learn more here. To read about what others have said about their emotional work, assessment and coaching experiences with me, see my testimonials page.